Also Sprach The Planet
There we were. The planet and I were locked in each others gravitational pull. Each dependent on the other. The inevitable exchange of energies both expressed and unexpressed. Communications continue on all levels of existence, aware and unaware. Things are communicated and exchanged always, over distances vast and small. Effects are caused and visa versa.
The use of resources expends them, does replacement ever really keep up. The important question should always be are they being squandered, or wisely used for enhancement of the sojourn. Just as natural resources can be expended in decades while taking millions of years to create, so leveraging futures of satellites for the Planets and my goals can make the balance show a negative flow. But then was paying attention to the net loss flow creating more of the same. Was not acknowledging it going to change that trend? When do you stop throwing good energy after failed outcomes? When you start looking at the world and begin to feel total connectedness of all things many things become apparent. I wasn't looking or feeling, so nothing was apparent. As for my present hindsight? Delusion, deduction, or dementia? But whilst in the gravitational pull of the Planet, either needy, selfish, or on a mission and not aware of the total interconnectedness of things, one only feels drained.
Yet as merged as we both unknowingly were, looking back on things that you can never change much becomes apparent. Or so it seems now. The Planet and I were wearing each other out. Hopefully some of that energy was transferred to the satellites. Because they were just that. Open and receptive little sponges soaking in all around them. Bless the little sputniks hearts. While the Planet and I were draining all our energies in some sort of gravitational fracas, just as the earth from a distance may appear the calm blue marble spinning in the vastness of open space; while on ground level the dirt is full of rot, decay, and festering malignancies, so all appeared serene on the surface of our existence. But from such things birth comes forth.
As the unchanging landscape of the bleak and economically depressed South Shore panorama snaked by dailey, these were the thoughts that would fill my brain. I felt less and less connected to the world of business, more and more drawn to the world created in the depths of Indiana. My heart was drawn to what I really cared about. The Planet and the satellites. The next eye candy moving picture show to hawk and maintain market share of the newest snake oil or must have widget that must be possessed for fulfillment and prosperity was losing it's importance to my existence. But the cash flow this generated did not. Twenty years of success, which felt effortless, had lulled me into to a false sense of security. But our DNA demands competitiveness. It also gives us awareness of damage being done to it's structures. The pain, the demands had given me had made me numb to what was a living chronic infection. Only I could address the pain because it was mine. Each step was being counted. Measurements were taken on the necessity and benefit each step would produce. But the seeping festering wounds must be cauterized.
I knew what I had to do.